Assignent Solutionnurs

���What were your childhood cultural experiences, family rituals, and fears regarding death and dying. How has it influenced you in your thinking today regarding death and grief?”
Please don’t write from your perspective please write from my perspective. My perspective is below. When my grandmother died in a car accident due to being upset and leaving because she didn’t like what I said about her when I was a child she died in a car accident. I disassociated from the chaos in my household and didn’t know what was going on. A week later I saw my thirty year old aunt fall from a 5 story building. I ran downstairs and saw what she looked like with her head cracked open bleeding. I couldn’t believe it was suicide because she cared too much about me. She wouldn’t do that in the presence of a child but now that I’m looking at it perhaps she didn’t. All these years I didn’t pray that she would go to heaven because I didn’t think it was suicide. Last year I had a dream that she was happy. Perhaps she was in purgatory and finally found peace in heaven.
It’s not difficult for me to be distracted by the idea of death when I still see clients in a chaotic detox/residential facility who are completely out of control and need stabilization. As many times as I tried to post this August 19th before midnight an emergency at the detox/residential facility would distract me from this post and my own mortality. What disturbs me about death is the failure of my life’s greatest ambition which is EGO but also for the greater good of all of humanity. I would also be disturbed to think that I wouldn’t be the strongest person at my father’s funeral & hopefully that’s decades to come. My mother is so healthy that she will probably out live all of us and good for her because I also love her to death. Adjustments and big changes also disturb me about death. I don’t like uncertainty like what will I do after the death of direct family. How can I be strong and stable enough? I like the certainty of knowing I will one day die. This is because I believe preparedness makes us powerful & this gives me time to prepare on how to die peacefully; but this raises the question am I living to live or living to prepare for death? There’s a story of a Russian piano player whose wife went shopping and when she came back her husband peacefully fell asleep and died on the piano he was playing while having fell asleep on it. I think about and ruminate on how my actions and decisions will affect the future generations to come.